The bros at Soul assassins invited me down to the MACHETE premiere, I was in a rush and forgot my fucking camera, so I got a lot of blurry iphone flicks sorry. But basically the entire cast (minus deniro and Lindsey lohan) would all ride in these lowriders,(4 of those bad boys are Mr. Cartoon's) up to the orpehum theater, with trejo leading the pack.
Human centipede, here is a picture of me taking a picture of willie-t , taking a picture of estevan oriol- taking a picture of Robert Rodriguez.
estevan snapping some flicks before the chaos starts, check out the cane, pimp
when jessica alba rolled up and got out of the car, you cant really see it in this picture, but she had some kind of special ointment , lotion or cream spread all over her legs, or maybe i'm wrong maybe it's just her angelic skin, that makes it look so shiny and slippery, like her legs were wet, it looked like she was basted, and i wanted to eat her like a butterball turkey.
It was pretty much common knowledge to everyone that I was as hot as Jessica alba , so they let me ride in one of the cars behind her.
When danny started up his hog and led the whole pack of lowriders to the red carpet, the crowd went wild!
it was nut's riding up to the theater , people were going crazy, and the car i was riding in was blasting blondie and zeppelin!
this dude eric richardson took the best photo
inside a mariachi band jammed out before the movie
no cameras or phones were allowed in the theater, but i hid mine in my pussy , and snapped this , security made me put it away right before trejo came out.but heres michelle rodriguez, jessica alba, don johnson, cheech, and robert. the movie was fucking great! i loved it. i'm really happy for danny . look for some killer art from me very soon for MACHETE!
I went to the premiere with sasha grey ..In this picture you can make out Quentin tarantino but sasha looks like a francis bacon painting, tarantino said ,” sure I’ll take a picture with sasha, I saw you in entourage last night, you were great.” And that’s pretty much what everyone said last night “sasha I love you in entourage!” so I said what did people say to you before that? “sasha I loved you in the girlfriend experience!” and what did people say before that? We loved you in Seinfeld: A XXX Parody? Asstravaganza 3? Swallow My Children? Butt Sex Bonanza ???? “ nope they just say sasha, I love your work!”
Last time I hung out with sasha some fuckface walked right up to her and said “hey whats up with the asians?” wow I guess I got a little soft, I forgot people still say shit like that (even in hollywood), so they must still think shit like that….The orpheum theater is not far from my warehouse, so I was walking around the neighborhood taking in the cool night air, when a car with at least 7 out of control mexicans rolled up on me and screamed, “oh shit it’s Jackie chan!”
My friend rhode got me reading scott pilgrim, I hate almost any art with the manga style or manga look, so it sat on my shelf for a very long time, once I picked it up, it was pretty good, I read almost the whole series, and then the movie came out, i recently bro’d out with one of my musical hero’s dan the automator , hes a scholar and a gentleman, and the dude loves to eat more than me, but stays in shape, he knows every killer joint in any town to grind at. Anyways he had me as his plus one, for a movie he just did some soundtrack shit for, Scott pilgrim! (these pictures are a little old)
This was at the mann Chinese in Hollywood, which has this massive red curtain inside, dan and Kid Koala were dj’ing in front of the audience before the movie.
I thought the movie was ok , basically chicks that have those side hair things that come down sort of like the hassidic jews, bugs the shit out of me, and throw in rollerblades on top of that and set the whole movie in Canada, forget it, the whole premise of the movie is fighting over this hot ass bitch that everyone is obsessed over because she’s hot as shit(if this were the 80’s Wynona would’ve been perfect for this role). But to me since she was like whatever ,it was not so believable that all these dudes would be that into her, but white people, especially canadians are weird, and I have my own specials tastes, but that haircut she was rocking, was not doing it for me ,
but I looked like this 6 months ago so who am I to be the fashion police, I want to kill myself when I see this picture(but like the shirt and song says,"nothing lasts forever") . the movie was still fun to watch, but the asian chick was hotter.
